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critique please

petyrc

MobiStarlet
Real Name
Petyr Campos
Device
iPhone 7 Plus
would love feedback on this image.

moving back to chicago last year was a very disruptive experience and created a lot of turmoil for me and my family. lets just say im keeping a lot of therapist gainfully employed. [emoji3]

one thing i've thinking a lot about this past year is identity. specifically about my identity, who am i? who do i "think" i am? who was i in my past? who am i becoming? all big questions, no easy answers. But i've also been thinking about identity in more general/society terms about how we identify ourselves to others. i only have to look to my teenage daughter to see how is trying create an identity for herself.

anyway...i've been thinking and struggling on how to translate my ideas and thought on this subject into imagery. this is my first attempt. the letters highlighted in white spell "identity". the words are jumbled because we are jumbled. i used a mannequin as the figure because it is blank and neutral like us in the beginning and then start making it what we want it/us to be. i overlayed some real eyes on the mannequin to give it a more human feel to it.

so what do u think? what thoughts come to your mind when u see this image? am i getting my point/thoughts about identity to the viewer?

thanks for taking time to view the image and hopefully your feedback.
 

JillyG

MobiLifer
Mobi Veteran
Real Name
Jilly
Device
iPhone 11 Pro Max
My 365
My MobiTog 365
would love feedback on this image.

moving back to chicago last year was a very disruptive experience and created a lot of turmoil for me and my family. lets just say im keeping a lot of therapist gainfully employed. [emoji3]

one thing i've thinking a lot about this past year is identity. specifically about my identity, who am i? who do i "think" i am? who was i in my past? who am i becoming? all big questions, no easy answers. But i've also been thinking about identity in more general/society terms about how we identify ourselves to others. i only have to look to my teenage daughter to see how is trying create an identity for herself.

anyway...i've been thinking and struggling on how to translate my ideas and thought on this subject into imagery. this is my first attempt. the letters highlighted in white spell "identity". the words are jumbled because we are jumbled. i used a mannequin as the figure because it is blank and neutral like us in the beginning and then start making it what we want it/us to be. i overlayed some real eyes on the mannequin to give it a more human feel to it.

so what do u think? what thoughts come to your mind when u see this image? am i getting my point/thoughts about identity to the viewer?

thanks for taking time to view the image and hopefully your feedback.
It's a really great image Petyr. If it was mine, I would make a little bit more of the eyes and maybe put a question mark above the head to suggest enquiry. I love all the letters.
 

FundyBrian

MobiLifer
Mobi Veteran
MobiSupporter
Real Name
Brian Townsend
Device
iPhone 8 Plus
My 365
My MobiTog 365
would love feedback on this image.

moving back to chicago last year was a very disruptive experience and created a lot of turmoil for me and my family. lets just say im keeping a lot of therapist gainfully employed. [emoji3]

one thing i've thinking a lot about this past year is identity. specifically about my identity, who am i? who do i "think" i am? who was i in my past? who am i becoming? all big questions, no easy answers. But i've also been thinking about identity in more general/society terms about how we identify ourselves to others. i only have to look to my teenage daughter to see how is trying create an identity for herself.

anyway...i've been thinking and struggling on how to translate my ideas and thought on this subject into imagery. this is my first attempt. the letters highlighted in white spell "identity". the words are jumbled because we are jumbled. i used a mannequin as the figure because it is blank and neutral like us in the beginning and then start making it what we want it/us to be. i overlayed some real eyes on the mannequin to give it a more human feel to it.

so what do u think? what thoughts come to your mind when u see this image? am i getting my point/thoughts about identity to the viewer?

thanks for taking time to view the image and hopefully your feedback.
You certainly set yourself a complex task. Since we are first reading your background story it is bound to affect how we see your image.
As I explore your image certain ideas come to mind and I will go along and see how they add up. It is sort of a verbal discovery process so you can see my feelings as I explore.
The person inside, whether mannequin or a real person, is very concealed, or unknown? The person outside is expressed in terms of scrambled text. A message may be there but how do I decipher it. Perhaps it means that words describing the outward appearance fail to accurately convey the person within. The only part exposing the inside is the eyes - often described as the window to the soul. This is the only part being revealed but not very much. In this portrayal, whether you want to invite people to know the person within or remain concealed is entirely dependent on the eyes. You don't want people to base their feeling about you by what they see on the outside. Or perhaps you don't feel your outward appearance matches your inward self. So we're back to the eyes. If you want to remain a concealed watcher then the eyes remain dark. If you want to invite people to know the person inside then something from the inside must shine out to say, "yes, someone is in here, take a chance to know me".
I don't know if that tells you what you want to know. It only reveals my thinking as I explored your image. I'm sure each person would have their own interpretation.
 

terse

MobiLifer
MobiSupporter
Real Name
Ted
Device
iPhone Xs
I didn't notice the eyes at first, and I liked that later discovery as a way to get me looking more closely at the image. I'd like to see the background a bit less shadowy to reinforce the idea of something -- a person, an identity -- being carved out of the alphabet soup. Identity wasn't the first thing that came to mind when I looked at the image, I think because I associate identity more with images and words or names rather than letters (but letters are the building blocks of words, on the other hand).
 

FundyBrian

MobiLifer
Mobi Veteran
MobiSupporter
Real Name
Brian Townsend
Device
iPhone 8 Plus
My 365
My MobiTog 365
I didn't notice the eyes at first, and I liked that later discovery as a way to get me looking more closely at the image. I'd like to see the background a bit less shadowy to reinforce the idea of something -- a person, an identity -- being carved out of the alphabet soup. Identity wasn't the first thing that came to mind when I looked at the image, I think because I associate identity more with images and words or names rather than letters (but letters are the building blocks of words, on the other hand).
I agree. I never would have decoded "identity" from the letters without help.
 

petyrc

MobiStarlet
Real Name
Petyr Campos
Device
iPhone 7 Plus
I didn't notice the eyes at first, and I liked that later discovery as a way to get me looking more closely at the image. I'd like to see the background a bit less shadowy to reinforce the idea of something -- a person, an identity -- being carved out of the alphabet soup. Identity wasn't the first thing that came to mind when I looked at the image, I think because I associate identity more with images and words or names rather than letters (but letters are the building blocks of words, on the other hand).
terse. thanks for the feedback and identifying areas to work on.
 

petyrc

MobiStarlet
Real Name
Petyr Campos
Device
iPhone 7 Plus
You certainly set yourself a complex task. Since we are first reading your background story it is bound to affect how we see your image.
As I explore your image certain ideas come to mind and I will go along and see how they add up. It is sort of a verbal discovery process so you can see my feelings as I explore.
The person inside, whether mannequin or a real person, is very concealed, or unknown? The person outside is expressed in terms of scrambled text. A message may be there but how do I decipher it. Perhaps it means that words describing the outward appearance fail to accurately convey the person within. The only part exposing the inside is the eyes - often described as the window to the soul. This is the only part being revealed but not very much. In this portrayal, whether you want to invite people to know the person within or remain concealed is entirely dependent on the eyes. You don't want people to base their feeling about you by what they see on the outside. Or perhaps you don't feel your outward appearance matches your inward self. So we're back to the eyes. If you want to remain a concealed watcher then the eyes remain dark. If you want to invite people to know the person inside then something from the inside must shine out to say, "yes, someone is in here, take a chance to know me".
I don't know if that tells you what you want to know. It only reveals my thinking as I explored your image. I'm sure each person would have their own interpretation.
fundybrian, thanks for your thoughtout feedback, much appreciated. maybe i'm trying to pack too many or too complex messages in my image. i struggle to create composite images that articulate a particular story or message. im still going to try because i find that work to me the most rewarding, it's just going to take awhile for me to succeed at it.
 

JillyG

MobiLifer
Mobi Veteran
Real Name
Jilly
Device
iPhone 11 Pro Max
My 365
My MobiTog 365
fundybrian, thanks for your thoughtout feedback, much appreciated. maybe i'm trying to pack too many or too complex messages in my image. i struggle to create composite images that articulate a particular story or message. im still going to try because i find that work to me the most rewarding, it's just going to take awhile for me to succeed at it.
I struggle too Petyr. zenjenny Jen is wonderful at it. I'm going to keep trying too. :thumbs:
 

FundyBrian

MobiLifer
Mobi Veteran
MobiSupporter
Real Name
Brian Townsend
Device
iPhone 8 Plus
My 365
My MobiTog 365
fundybrian, thanks for your thoughtout feedback, much appreciated. maybe i'm trying to pack too many or too complex messages in my image. i struggle to create composite images that articulate a particular story or message. im still going to try because i find that work to me the most rewarding, it's just going to take awhile for me to succeed at it.
Yes, we all struggle to achieve our visions. Very exciting when we get close.
 

petyrc

MobiStarlet
Real Name
Petyr Campos
Device
iPhone 7 Plus
all, again thanks for your feedback. i think one of my over all issues is that i try to say too much in a image, so they become too complex and convoluted for the viewer to interpret. i guess less is more in this instance
 

Ryn S

MobiLurver
MobiSupporter
Real Name
Ryn S
Device
iPhone 7 Plus
My 365
My MobiTog 365
You certainly set yourself a complex task. Since we are first reading your background story it is bound to affect how we see your image.
As I explore your image certain ideas come to mind and I will go along and see how they add up. It is sort of a verbal discovery process so you can see my feelings as I explore.
The person inside, whether mannequin or a real person, is very concealed, or unknown? The person outside is expressed in terms of scrambled text. A message may be there but how do I decipher it. Perhaps it means that words describing the outward appearance fail to accurately convey the person within. The only part exposing the inside is the eyes - often described as the window to the soul. This is the only part being revealed but not very much. In this portrayal, whether you want to invite people to know the person within or remain concealed is entirely dependent on the eyes. You don't want people to base their feeling about you by what they see on the outside. Or perhaps you don't feel your outward appearance matches your inward self. So we're back to the eyes. If you want to remain a concealed watcher then the eyes remain dark. If you want to invite people to know the person inside then something from the inside must shine out to say, "yes, someone is in here, take a chance to know me".
I don't know if that tells you what you want to know. It only reveals my thinking as I explored your image. I'm sure each person would have their own interpretation.
Funny Brian nailed it! I would have liked to have seen the image first, then to have read the commentary so that I wouldn't be primed. I had to search for the eyes, I'd like them to be easier to see. If you want tha blank mannequin beginning to be part of the growth process I think we need to see some blank form. Also, perhaps some numbers and some small images like Polaroid-ish? to give me the idea that it's not just about letters? Just some thoughts. I love the image as it is, but I don't think I would've connected it to your intention right off the bat.I struggled with same things back when I was drawing and painting. With photography I have been too focused on getting pretty pictures and figuring out how all these different apps work to do any deep, thoughtful, imagery. Kudos to you and thanks for the inspiration.
 
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